Well here it is March 16. Clocks have been sprung forward, days are getting longer, and things are warming up outside. With the end of the school year looming on the horizon it’s a great time to start searching for summer activities.
I know that with the economy still in bad shape and a lot of us do not have stacks of cash to do all the things with your kids that you would like to do. Most theme parks are going to charge you forty dollars minimum, and the house of the mouse, well you might want to go to your bank for a loan before heading to that ticket booth.
But it is not all bad news, with a little research it is amazing the kind of all day events you can find in your own area for under fifteen dollars per person. This past weekend we went to Moccasin Lake Nature Park in Clearwater Florida. This was a great way to spend six hours; they have live animal exhibits to introduce the kids to the local residents of this wooded area. Then you can take the nature trail that goes out to the lake which has an observation deck on the water where you can watch the great water birds, turtles and the alligators that call it home.
The price of this was $2 per person for residents and a whopping $2.75 for non residents. I am going to start compiling a list of activates that are both affordable and educational. I can’t travel to them all so anybody else who has found a place to take family please let me know about it so we can get it out there for others. I searched local parks and recreation online and it is loaded with places and events. This can be a great low cost summer with memories that will last forever.
My daughter is a big fan of Dr. Seuss, she reads all of his books all of the time. I also love his work too. One night, my daughter was reading one of his stories to me and I happened to be looking at the Dr. Seuss books on the shelf and saw, Green Eggs and Ham. This gave me an idea! In the morning, which happened to be a Saturday morning, I went into her room and got the Green Eggs and Ham book and took it to the dinning room. I placed it at her table spot. I then went into the kitchen and and cut up a ham steak and fried it. I then cracked a couple of eggs in a bowl and added some green food coloring to it, whisked it up real good and then scrambled them. To me, the eggs looked aweful, but it did look like something kids would love. I placed the green eggs and ham at her table place and called her for breakfast. The look on her face when she saw that was priceless! She laughed so hard and sat down to eat her Dr. Suess treat! She had so much fun. She read the book and ate the “Green Eggs and Ham” with a huge smile on her face!
This was a fun breakfast morning I spent with her. She thought it was the best breakfast ever! She told her friends at school on Monday and her friends all went home telling their parents that they want green eggs and ham. Some of the parents have come up to me when I pick my daughter up at school and they tell me that they did the same thing for their kids and they all had a blast doing it! Try it with your kids, it is a lot of fun. But, make sure you add the reading part into it too. This is just another way to get your kids to read more and have fun with reading.
Being a single father, one of the hardest and most time consuming chores I have found is cooking dinner. When I was growing up, I was fortunate to have a mother and father. My mother would do the typical house wife thing and my father would do the typical father thing. Mom would make sure we had dinner on the table all week. But, on Sundays, she took the night off! My father isn’t much of a cook at all, but he could make pizza. My mother would sit in the living room and put her feet up and kick back with a book, relax and enjoy being waited on. She deserved it! My father, sister and I would make home made pizzas and we would have a treat where we would sit down in the living room at the coffee table and watch the Muppets and Disney while we ate our pizza. This was a special treat every Sunday night. When we were done, we would continue to pamper mom by doing the dishes and cleaning up the kitchen for her. There isn’t a lot of cleanup to do with home made pizza!
Now, being a single dad, we don’t have the luxury of kicking back and being waited on, but making pizza isn’t that hard, it is fun and the cleanup is a treat to us! I have continued this tradition with my daughter. Every Sunday we make home made pizza together, we sit in the living room in front of the TV and I watch a kids show with her. After we are done eating, we go into the kitchen and cleanup. My daughter is eight, she feels very involved in the whole process. She looks so forward to Sunday night, spending time together doing our special thing. She loves to help make the pizza and she even loves to help out afterwards. If you time it right, after the cleanup, bath time can be accomplished too!
This becomes one less meal to plan during the week! It is routine and kids look forward to the time they get to spend with their fathers. It becomes something special to them and they will remember it forever and may pass on the tradition to their kids as well. I also do Taco Tuesdays! Another great and quick meal to make and very easy to clean up. A great meal that kids can help make and help clean up too. Taco’s and home made pizza aren’t expensive. You can buy a lot of the ingredients in bulk.
Dinners don’t have to be time consuming, difficult, expensive and exhausting. They can be easy and fun! Believe me, simplifying things like this really has saved my sanity!
Fellow single fathers… we have another dad that needs some help! His situation sounds all to familiar to all of us. Posted below is his email he sent me. Is there anyone that may have some suggestions or ideas to help him? You can either post your suggestions or ideas here or you can email me at: bob@singlefatherhelp.com. Lets all band together to help each other!! Thanks – Bob
My situation is very unique. I’m a single father who’s involved with DHS because my daughters mother allowed a tragic thing happen to my beautiful baby girl. She came into contact with some so horrible. My daughter is now out of harms way. I was granted custody, however I wasn’t able to find a job within a 3 month period. I lived in a state where I had limited resources and couldn’t come up with the next months rent. I was forced to leave under those circumstances without my baby.
I returned home to get established, with work, a home, and security. To get off of the welfare line. Two weeks later… I was involved in a traumatic vehicle accident. It was so severe that I’m now classified disabled for at least a year . I fractured my left femur bone in 7 places and have a metal rod inserted. I accumulated many medical bills.
I’m not able to do the work I’m accustomed to. Construction, Warehouse, basically manual labor, and may never be able to return to that vocation. My family is supportive, so I began what’s termed ICPC which will place my daughter here in Arkansas, where she currently resides in Oregon.
I failed twice to complete the ICPC process with my sister because she’s going thru a messy divorce. On two separate occasion’s she had agreed but at the last minute she pulled out, leaving me too look in DHS’s eyes as unstable.
I’m waiting for SSD decision and I’m living with my father recovering from the injuries I sustained in the accident. I’m at the mercy of other’s, struggling to find a way to bring her home to me. I’m a wonderful father and am under a great strain.
I’m at a loss for solutions and if you’ve got any ideas I would appreciate anything you could come up with
This morning I turned on the news as I always do with my cup of coffee while my daughter is getting ready for school. Normally, I see things on the news that are unbelievable. But, this morning, I saw something that made me furious. Now, we single fathers are always getting the worst of everything, wrong impressions and a bad rap of things. This really cuts it!
There is a company out there called, American Girl. They make and sell dolls that are very expensive and there are many types of these dolls. There are a few dolls that sound cool enough; Such as, an African-American doll that is a slave and escaping and looking for her father and brother. A girl growing up in the Revolutionary War era, a Mexican girl that is trying to preserve her heritage after her mother dies, a Nez Perce girl who is determined to become a better person and various others. Each doll comes with a story, a few books about her. But, American Girl has now come up with a new doll that is really offensive to me and to other single fathers. That doll is called, Gwen Thompson. Her story is about her and her mom are homeless after her father walked out on the family and her mother lost her job. Now they are living in the car.
The part that really makes me angry is the fact that, of course, there has to be a father that abandoned the family. We are made out to be bad again; we are worthless and very bad. This teaches kids that fathers are awful and we just leave our family and force them and their mothers to live in a car. They are teaching kids that poor moms are such victims and that fathers don’t care about them. If this were a reversal, us single fathers would probably be taken to jail, kids taken away from us and we are really bad parents to put our kids through such an environment. But, it is ok for moms to do such a thing because they are the victims and were forced to do so, because men are bad!
I am really getting tired of being labeled as a bad person, only because I am a single father raising my daughter. I don’t understand why people is so shocked that I am raising my kid on my own, I mean, I am a man! Because I am a man, I must not have a nurturing bone in my body, I can’t cook, clean, do laundry, spend time with my daughter, do homework time, make sure she has her checkups, etc. etc. etc. I mean, really, I am a man. How can I possibly know how to do any of that?
I especially love how we see commercials, advertisements, specials and articles for single mothers and not single fathers. I am especially happy to see a company create a doll that teaches our young kids that fathers are a piece of garbage and we are no good. These dolls are $95 and you can buy expensive accessories for these dolls too. So many children want these dolls and parents are running out buying them. There are so many of us single fathers that are raising our kids. There are so many fathers that share in raising their kids too. Also, there are so many fathers that would love to raise there kids and can’t either. So, I am enraged that a company would create something of this nature that just adds more stereotype to us single fathers. We aren’t all deadbeats, in fact, most of us aren’t. Usually, the mother is ticked off and won’t let the father see their kids and brainwash them. Well, I guess there is another tool they can use against us!!
Hi Everyone! I have a single father that sent me an email with this statement and question:
IM a SINGLE DA with a question?
if im a single father that apys his child support on-time!…..THEN should i have the right to VISITATION to my CHILD???
Although this is a basic question, he does bring up a point. Most of us don’t understand how the “system” works. I certainly don’t! Logic says that if we pay child support, then we should automatically see our kids. But this isn’t the case. Usually, when there is a divorce or a separation, a court hearing occurs. Depending on what the court says depends on if you can see your kids or not. If you pay child support and the courts say that you can see your kids, then, I would assume that you can. Unfortunately, a lot of our ex’s won’t let us see our kids or play games with us. Technically, if the courts say you can see your kids and your ex’s won’t let you, then they are in the wrong.
What can we do about it? Well, this is the part that can be difficult, unfair and could be costly. There are ways to get help. There are government agencies and private agencies. Below you will see a couple of posts that I have written that has some good links and information that may be able to help. Take a look and check them out!
Again, if anyone has any additional info and/or help, please feel free to post a comment or email me directly at: bob@singlefatherhelp.com. Thanks – Bob
Guys, I also did a little bit of research and found these sites to look at too. Hope this helps to get you all going in the right direction. It takes some research and a lot of reading, but it is worth it for our kids!! – Bob
http://www.lsc.gov This website has federal and state specific legal advice and help.
http://www.legal-aid.org/en/home.aspx This is another website that has legal information that may help as well.
Hi guys! I received an email from a father that is having some problems being able to see or even speak with his daughter. Here is what he sent me:
I NEED HELP…..i pay child support !……but I have no way of being physically involved with my daughter……how can i get physically involved in my daughters life , when i live 1200 miles away & the mother wont let me even talk to hear on the phone…..help
Unfortunately, this happens time and time again. There are no easy answers or solutions. The most important thing to do is to not give up! It is frustrating, but don’t ever give up! If the mother and father can’t work things out, then getting a lawyer is a must. I know most arguements about getting a lawyer is the expense, but there are some out there that will work with you on the finances. Also, don’t forget about contacting social services, they have a wealth of information that can help. It may take some effort and there may be some hoops, but social services are there to help and they deal with this every day. Also, I found this website with a lot of information, it may be of some use to everyone in this situation: http://deltabravo.net Remember, things this serious takes time and energy, it isn’t easy, but once you get rolling, results will happen.
If anyone has any other ideas or suggestions, please post a comment or send me an email: bob@singlefatherhelp.com – Bob
Singlefatherhelp.com received an email from a very concerned mother. She is looking for help for her son in these tough times. She is not alone, as we all are experiencing tough times and hard decisions. Here is her email she sent:
My son is a single parent who is renting in Roseville where he has his two children already signed up for school….He is active on trying to find a cheaper rental as he can not afford the landlords increased rate…..He has suffered a blow when a company that for 75 years never had any lay offs, laid him off due to the economy situation…the company had to tighten its belts…In so doing, my son
had to find a new job and lesser pay. When searching for rental they always ask for record current and the unfortunate thing, due to the delayed paychecks with his new job he had late payments and paid as much as he could…..I think the home he is renting was always too much for his budget but he wanted to give the best for his daughter and son.
Is there any way he can get help?
Sincerely,
Mom xxxxxx
Unfortunately, we all have to re-budget and rethink the way we are living. We all have to sacrifice a great deal. Of course we all want to provide the best for our kids, but if we can’t afford to live the way we used to, then we are forced to turn to alternative ways. By giving your kids the best love, being there for them, talking to them and getting them to understand what is happening, in my opinion, is the best we can give them. Kids are very understanding and they will help and do there part to help the family situations. Get them involved in whatever situation you are facing.
If you need help with housing, food, employment, healthcare, etc., there are a few places to turn to. I found this great website that will help in pointing out areas of help in your area. The web address is: www.211.org. If you are experiencing housing problems, www.hud.gov is also another website to look at. Also, on my website, www.singlefatherhelp.com, I have compiled a wealth of government links for each state as well as links for federal information. On the menu bar is a button that says, government, hover your mouse over it and you will see a list of federal and states to choose from.
Guys, if you need help, don’t be afraid to get it. Don’t be afraid to apply for help. Single mothers have been going after help for years, we can too! Remember, we can’t all live the way we have been living, we all have to sacrifice here and there to make it. Get your kids involved and make it a family project. You may be surprised as to how your kids will respond and will get excited in helping and how much they will understand what is happening in our economy!
Once again, I look forward to your comments and suggestions. If anyone has any links or advice that can be given on this subject, please make a post or email me directly at: bob@singlefatherhelp.com. I will not publish any names or email addresses without your permission. – Bob
Well, it is that time of year again. Summer is coming to an end and the kids are dreading it, the parents are excited! One of the biggest problems we parents are going to have is getting our kids up for school and getting them to bed earlier. I have been trying to get my daughter to bed a little earlier at night and I am finding it to be a little difficult. She is a good girl and will go to bed, but a few minutes later she comes out complaining about an ache or pain. I put her to bed again and a few minutes later, she is back out saying she has to go to the bathroom, or any other excuse she can come up with. It is rather funny, but can be somewhat annoying too. When the morning comes, she is used to sleeping in a little bit longer than normal, so getting her up is harder to do. The only advice I can give on this subject is to be patient with your kids. They are having a hard time adjusting and they are doing the best they can. I like to start about a week before school starts and gradually get my daughter to bed a little earlier and get her up a little earlier each day. This seems to help her to adjust a little easier. By the time school comes around, she will still have to adjust, but it won’t be so dramatic for her. Does anyone else have any ideas or suggestions on how to help our kids adjust to the school time schedules?
